Feeling... nothing :)

I recently found out that my first real boyfriend knocked some girl, with twins no less!

I thought, back in the day, that I'd always have feelings for this guy. Weren't we all so naive when we were kids? I thought that he was the man for me up until about college timeframe. We were together in 8th grade, though kept in close contact up until mid-college. I think we went completely different ways at some point. That sounds kind of bad, but it's not really meant to be. I don't like to think that I'm better than him in some way, we're just different.

But when I read the note about the twins, I didn't feel anything, no jealousy, no regret. Just nothing. It's been like that for some time, with exes. I guess it's part of being satisfied with the relationship I'm in so much so that I don't even care about past loves. Good feeling really. Moving forward with him, leaving these others behind... yeah! :)

Reading reading reading....

I kind of wonder why I hadn't read this one yet. The movie was on and I figured I needed to get going on that... I know it's been sitting on my shelf for a while. Funny enough, a lot of the analysis of this book is wrong, according to most people who have read it.

Seeing the movie and having been in the Army, you ask yourself, who the hell had the WORST combat tactics ever. I would have never gotten that close to any of those bugs. Why would they not just firebomb the entire planet? It doesn't make sense. Kind of makes me mad. Oh well, it is just a movie. LOL

Starship Troopers by Robert A. Heinlein




I figured it's about time.



View all my reviews

It's funny how that works.

I recently opened up the most recent copy of Harvard Business Review which I finally have a subscription to (don't have to steal dad's :) ), and funny enough, there's an blurb about exactly what I was talking about on the 12th.   I was even referring to CNN.com, but not by name.  I kind of was getting sick of reading... well, it's best served by an example.  I'm sure it won't take me long to find one....


Here's a comment from an article titled: 1 killed, 57 injured in Iraqi Kurdish protest
Kurdistan Democratic Party (KDP) is the worst dictator I have ever seen in my life, we can say worse than Saddam regime.


Seriously?  A party can't be a dictator.  A person is a dictator.


Then you have another article about Wolves, here is a brilliant comment... I can't even figure out how this fit into any semblance of discussion.  I think they're talking about furries, people who dress in animal costumes to live out fantasies... whatever they may be.  I can't make this stuff up.


Good! About time that governor learned how bad those furries really are. A bunch of children stalkers in their dog and wolf costumes, how perverted can you be?! I say kill the wolves and the people who pretend to be them so they can touch children bits while they get hugs!


Why do people even comment on this? It's really pointless.


And then one about Knees bearing the weight of obesity:


Duh, Get in shape America!!!!Save billions in health care costs.
Exercize more, eat less, eat healthy.


If you're going to comment for all the world to see, can you at least pay heed to your spell check?  And please, write in complete sentences.  I really get annoyed at people's laziness.


And here is another brilliant comment from the same article:


You know this article is missing one important factor, and that is, that there are relatively few doctors in this country who will do surgery on the morbidly obese. Yes, they will give bariatric surgery to those between 300 and 350 pounds, but not more than that. So what these stupid doctors are saying is that they need their obese paitients to lose weight to have surgery to lose more weight. If they could lose weight they would not need the surgery to begin with! I see it every day in my job and I feel so bad for all of them. Doctors are jerks.


Because they're jerks? That's quite a broad claim to make about somewhere around 400,000 individuals. I don't doubt that some are stupid since there are in fact stupid people everywhere, in every profession.  I heart ad hominem.  Although I ask myself if this individual is in that 350+ pound category since she (her name is apparently lilgtogirl, so I'm assuming here...) says "If they could lose the weight..." like she might have experience dealing with these difficulties. It just seems too personal.


Anyway, the bottom line of Clay Shirky's blurb (Cleaning up Online Conversation) about what he wants to do in the next year is pretty much summed up by the quote in blue from his little article. "In the 1990s putting up a forum that allowed anyone to say anything seemed like a good idea. It wasn't."  This is very true.  So very true.  Not everybody needs to open their mouths.  The first amendment wasn't created so you could spout off your ignorance.  Or, at least, nobody cares to hear it and it makes you look like an idiot... so you might as well shut your pie hole. Just sayin'.  I hope that when I say stupid things people tell me I'm wrong.  Or at least give me a look like "you are dumb" so I know.  Just so I know.  Haha...

Some people shouldn't be trusted to have children

There are countless examples.  I wish more people would use birth control.

It's not the first time Obama has faced ire from the right when it comes to childhood nutrition. Sarah Palin told Ingraham last fall that "the first lady cannot trust parents to make decisions for their own children, for their own families in what we should eat."


Sometimes I think there should be a parenthood test, if you don't meet a certain standard, you shouldn't be able to reproduce.  These issues bring to mind one of my friends from middle school telling me about her time as a social worker in NYC.  One mother in one of the programs was smoking while pregnant.  Please.  Although, the government can't be the one to monitor these sorts of things and tell people what to do.  It should come from a culture change, stemming from education.   

Comments on News Articles, blogs etc.

One of the most abnoxious things to me are some of the off the wall comments on news websites.

The most likely to respond, similar to a survey, are those that are either really happy or really pissed off.  The actual information and comments is not really a good indication of how things are actually going or what people actually think.  Similarly, this goes for blogs as well.  Those that are the most pissed or most excited or happy or whatever are going to write about it.  If its just "blah" nobody is going to waste the time commenting on it, unless you're a history book person or just documenting events with no opinion whatsoever.  But then still, what gets reported on, even in a documented fashion, is still likely to be stuff that whatever news agency thinks people want to read about.  I don't see how a news agency's website is really the right place for people to get up on their soap boxes.  I think that's what blogs are usually for... right? Haha...

I also, since I'm headed to law school next year, have been reading a lot about reasons not to go.  There are a myriad of reasons listed, some evidence points to blogs of disgruntled graduates finding a job market lacking.  I do sometimes wonder what kind of expectation management they've been doing.  Contrary to, it seems, these recent graduates' opinion, they're glorified college graduates.  Most students to graduate law school are just that, college graduates with a little extra--a professional degree.  But these students, despite their LSAT scores and GPAs that made them promising law students, they don't really have a whole lot to offer the job market in general.  Sure, there are some exceptions, and there are some even differing exceptions where a student graduates from law school prepared to get a post-school job (though proving this to potential employers takes considerable effort on the part of that student I think).  I have learned a couple of things, having worked for a couple of years in a rather demanding job.  One is that college doesn't prepare you to work.  It gives you a tool box full of nifty tools, but doesn't really tell you even how to use them or teach you the creativity to use other tools en lieu of tools you might not yet have.  Creativity is something not taught in school, neither are people skills, the ability to communicate effectively with others.  I just had a conversation with my mother yesterday about a situation at her former job.  A guy that worked with her was so difficult to work with, that he kept getting moved from job to job.  Regardless of how smart the guy was, he was pretty much useless to everybody because of his, well mostly, lack of tact when dealing with people. There was always a general consensus with my friends in the Army: we'd prefer a Soldier that was easy to work with and that could effectively communicate over one that couldn't.  You can't teach people skills, but most other things you can work with.

This isn't to say that experience guarantees success.  I watched a guy that screamed "Joe" (a guy that looks like a Soldier and has the mannerisms of a Soldier... even the hair cut) when I was at the Law School fair in Atlanta and I cringed when I heard him talking.  The military does a couple of things... but teaching you to communicate with civilians is not one of them.  If you can't take a step back and remember who you are and what you're doing then you need to just stop and take a breather.

Will I still go to law school? Yes.  My main reason is I want the legal education that comes with it.  However, am I this disillusioned to realize that the job market might be hard on me when I get out? No, I'm not.  I'm hoping nepotism (you do what you can to get your foot in the door, that's just the way it is!) might get me a little, and if not I'll take what I can get.  I never had dreams of being a Law and Order type of attorney; I've always been more fascinated by some of the philosophy.  I hope that when I get out my successes as an Army Officer will add an extra polish onto what I have to offer.  I'll just make sure I follow my dad's three H's: Humbleness, sense of Humor and Hardworking.  I think that these really are the keys to success.

Odd Idea

Wouldn't it be interesting if the Vice President were elected by a vote of the people like the President?

As of now, of course, the VP, while not seemingly a power house, actually holds a lot of clout in some situations.  If the President kicks the bucket, that's right, he's the President.  The VP stands in for the President in many other instances too.  Currently, the VP is selected by the President and approved by the Congress (Amendment 12, Constitution/Bill of Rights).  Though really, why can't the people elect both?  In addition, the Vice President heads the Senate and is the tie breaker for any votes that can't be decided.

I guess my thing is I always thought the "running mate" is kind of stupid.  It detracts and distracts from who we're really installing as the head of state, the United States.  Certainly, Palin distracted from her running mate, and you can argue in a positive or negative way (my personal opinion is that the woman is a hot mess, but that's beside the point).

Superbowl

For one of THE American pastimes, the Superbowl is probably one of the most out of reach traditions (save for sitting in front of the TV) for the average American.  Going to the Superbowl I'd think would run likely around 3,000, more than a lot of things many people can't afford anyway...

And then we got there, and it was one of the most pretentious events I've ever been to.  "Look at me, I'm so great, I'm the Superbowl!" It was kind of depressing.  Not that I wasn't glad to be blessed with the opportunity to attend thanks to the stars aligning (and planets); how my boyfriend and I managed to swing it for less than $400 is amazing.  Every chance they got, a new star or "important" person was featured on the jumbo--I mean, ridiculously huge--tron.  Like, look who is here! We're so cool everybody wants to come see us in person!

Maybe that's because it costs so much.  You have to feel like it was worth it to pay all that money for a five hour event. "Look, you're here, it's been totally worth it to pay what you could buy an entire car with to come see a five-hour event."

I shouldn't complain, I know.  I was one of the lucky ones and I did have a great time.  I have been blessed with good friends, who have good friends, who have very good friends that could get us into this event.  But thinking about it, if we wanted to go, how would we afford to?  I guess it will be sitting on the couch most likely for the rest of my life. Not that I mind really, time with friends and family is most important, much more important than being around a bunch of famous people that I don't know after all. Maybe some of my friends will be famous someday?

Protesters paid...

After the Internet shut down and the social media machine was disabled temporarily, it's back to the down and dirty hired mobs for the Egyptians it looks like.  Just like old times.  There are so many accounts and many speculations about where Wednesday's pro-Mobarak demonstrators came from.  Some might have been genuine.  In a dictatorship that has been going on for 30 years, there are sure to have been some distingushished "haves" (vs. the "have nots") who would like to stay in a place of power.  But  many, I'm betting were paid and encouraged by the regime or its cronies.  Sigh.

Some of these pictures are pretty nice. Read the blog for an explanation of the last two pictures.

Egypt and others

I find this article hilarious. America's other embarrassing allies.

I've been saying for a long time that America is a country that goes with the lesser of evils, but then often doesn't consider future ramifications... Lately, we've been hearing all about Egypt, an American ally.  Well, unfortunately, in the last three decades, Egypt's government has not mirrored what you think an ally would look like.  

Time and time again, America supports dictators who are consistently oppressing their people.  Granted, on the outside and to most people on this side of the pond, this dictator is more of a constant itch to the proud Egyptian people.  Or so you would think, since it's hasn't been your President for oh what, over 30 YEARS?  Can you imagine ____(insert your favorite President here)___ being president for 30 years?  A lot changes in 30 years (certainly, I'm not even 30 years old).  So you have to think that the best leader wouldn't be the same guy 30 years ago as it is today.  To put it in perspective this is what Europe looked like in 1981 (if you can't tell the difference, I can't help you there):

Now, if we know anything about the great old USA, not many people agree here.  And, it's in the constitution that we can't be forced to think anything; we have the right to think or say pretty much anything we want.  Well, not the case in Egypt.  Supposedly, this Prez has been elected since 1981.  But many International sources will tell you that these elections were rigged.  Even in the article featured on this link, its estimated that 10-20% of the population even BOTHERED to go out and vote.  In America, the numbers are still lower than they should be, but if 1 of 10 people are voting, that doesn't really give an accurate picture of anything. At least a majority of citizens must come out to vote.  In 2005, the election showed that the second place finisher only got 7% of the vote!  No leader is that perfect.

America seems to do this time after time.  The whole reason why I was in Afghanistan last was because of our mistakes in the past... The lessor of the two evils, the mujahideen in Afghanistan against the Soviets sounded like a good idea.  The Soviets were atheists, which Americans don't relate well to, at least as forced lack of religion (because there are certainly Atheists in the United States).  But then, do we really want a radical group of anything at the helm?  I would argue it probably would have been better for Afghanistan to have been Soviet since there was no way the Soviets would last forever.  Once they started borrowing and going into debt... But that's for another discussion... Afghans needed choice, as Iran needed choice.  Which is why the radicals ended up taking over.  I remember in college talking to a professor who was there, who was one of the first woman to don the black hijab in support of the Islamic Revolution.  Of course, she now regrets this support.  Although, it's common knowledge that Americans supported the Shah of Iran, another dictator, who was very unpopular in Iran... Does anybody see a pattern forming?

Back to Egypt.

I sincerely hope that there are some positives in this development.  Certainly, I hope that more than 10% of the population is involved with the next election that Mubarak said he wouldn't run in.  If the population is in control of the government, if they can elect leaders and continue to elect people if the people they first elect are in need of replacement, I think the future looks bright.  I think the new "scary" group that could take control of Egypt is Islamic (the American people seem to think that any group of Muslims are extremists).  However, Egypt has long been a center for Arab politics in particular, as in the race/ethnic group, and not Islam, although it is an integral part of society.  I must say however, that Christian beliefs in this country are used in the same way they fear that Islam will become intertwined in politics.  I watched the brand new Alabama governor tell people in his first speech that anybody not Christian was his brother.  Islam can co-exist with politics, and Egypt is a unique country in that 10% of the population is Christian (about 9% Coptic, which similar to Islam has no images of people in their churches and so on because that would be idolatry...), and those people are not likely to go anywhere anytime soon.

Nobody knows how this will end up, but I hope that real elections take place.  Although I'm not naive, it's not going to be that easy.  Peaceful protests turning violent as we speak... It would be a shame to see it under military rule.

Egypt is a country that I wish I had been able to visit.  I was going to study at the American University of Cairo in college.  However, ROTC wouldn't cover me to go.  Needless to say, I wasn't your typical "ROTC-nazi" either and preferred to stay away from the ROTC building as much as possible.  I really didn't care.  I knew I was going to live the Army for at least four years, and I wanted to enjoy college.  Can you blame me?  Someday, I still hope to go to AUC, maybe for an LLM in International Comparative Law after law school....

Sorry for the rant.  I don't know how coherent it was, but there is a lot going on in my head lately.

Good Reads

I recently joined goodreads.com, which is a sort of social networking site based around books that you read.  I've always read a lot and this seems right up my alley.  I've already even seen some of my friends books that I want to read!

I guess if you look at my profile, you can see all the crazy paranormal romance books I read, or as my boyfriend calls them, "vampire porn."  Though not all the books are about vampires, but as we know about romance novels most of them have porn like descriptions of the main character's sexual encounters.  I haven't put all the books I've read up, that might take a while.  I might get around to it eventually.

What I like about them is that there's almost always a happy ending.  I'm a happy ending type of girl.  There are enough depressing things in the world without having to read about MORE depressing things.  Tom (the boyfriend), once mentioned to me that he was watching chick flicks when we were in Afghanistan, deployed.  He said that we were surrounded by a depressing situation (the country of Afghanistan) and that he certainly didn't want to be watching "Blackhawk Down" or something similar.  The possibility of us getting kidnapped by the bad guys and then drug in pieces throughout the street of some far away town is not too far away from reality.  Although the reality we did live over there was almost as bad as being in the action.... being stuck on a FOB (Forward Operating Base), as a Fobbit (cross between FOB and Hobbit, what you become when you live on a FOB for a long time).  Luckily, your feet don't grow hairy....

I realize that life doesn't always have happy endings and to pretend that it does is just deluding yourself. However, I have chosen to read many books about Afghanistan, particularly on the subject of the women living there.  When I was in Afghanistan helping these women, my heart strings were pulled on a daily basis.  In a land where everybody vies for power, most of these women wanted to make sure that their children had food and water.  Most were illiterate and didn't even understand the reasons for the war.  I remember some of the Soldiers telling me that they met Afghans that thought we were Russians.  They were just that isolated.

I miss those women a lot, and I think frequently of them.  Apparently, they still ask about me.  Maybe I did make a small impact, at least in some of their lives, if not just to show them that some American women are respectable people.

   

    

      Brandi's book montage

    

  

  

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

      

    

Brandi Shaddick's favorite books »